大学英语自学教程： unit 14 友善及礼貌的重要性

　　14-A. The Importance of Being Kind and Polite

　　"Frankly, I think you’re boring.” Why do we seldom hear people speak so honestly? Unless you want to end a relationship, you don't tell another person what you think of her or him like this. Failing to be impressed by a friend's collection of stamps, yawning when a golfer tells you about that great shut he made on the 14th hole, or falling asleep when friends show pictures from their last trip to Sault Ste. Marie are all things that educated people try not to do. This is what manners are about: acting in a civilized way to avoid misunderstanding, friction, and conflict.

　　There are no laws enforcing respect. Yet we cannot interact with others without some rules of behavior, rules that are set by some form of social consensus. These guidelines represent what a majority of people consider acceptable and what they consider unacceptable. Rude people are those whose behavior shows little respect for the rules that the majority follow. For instance, because they talk at home while the television is on, many people think they can talk at movies as well. They are not even aware that this habit will bother the other members of the audience.

　　Restaurants have smoking and non-smoking sections, and most smokers are polite enough to ask, "Do you mind if I smoke?" before lighting up. Restaurants should also have cellular-phone and no-cellular-phone sections. A new class of rude people has been born: the look-at-me phone users whose boring conversations are just as dangerous to our mental health as smoke is to our lungs. Sometimes, it is better to remain unknown than to make pimple hate you.

　　There are many children and adolescents whose behavior is generally unacceptable. They swear no matter who is around them, they listen to their Walkmans while the teacher is talking to them. Indifferent parents who refuse to discipline their children are not helping them. Kids who have no idea what being polite means will pay the price sooner or later. When they join the work force, their employers and associates alike will soon realize that the behavior of these rude young people is closer to that of animals than civilized individuals. When they lose a few contracts because they talk with their mouth full, or when they say "Bob" to someone who should be "Mr. Johnson," these grown-up kids, because of their ignorance, will never understand why others are getting ahead and they are not.

　　Every little bit of kindness helps. With manners, the best rule is the one that works. It is easier to look and sound attractive when we are nice to other people. Being polite and showing respect can give us an edge. Why do we need an edge? Success in life often starts with a job we like, and since getting a job is usually based on making the right impression, it is always a good idea to be kind and polite.